It has been a fair while now since my last blog post to say the least! I cannot really remark on why it is that I have taken so long to write a new post. I do, however, know what has driven me write one now. I have decided to give my blog a long needed dusting down and end this trend of stagnancy simply because I want to mark a very pivotal point in my life.
I am leaving England to work as an intern game artist for Ubisoft Pune, India. This is quite simply the biggest thing to ever happen to me, and it highlights many important changes in who I am. For one thing, I feel confident and prepared for this experience rather than nervous and irresolute — which is a big shift from the person I used to be. I am being thrown into the deep end of a swimming pool with only a slight knowledge of how to swim but I feel that I am now experienced enough to cope outside of my depth and learn to swim while I am drowning.
There are a multitude of reasons as to why I feel this opportunity is ideal for me. Aside from the fact that I absolutely adore everything about Southern Asia and the Himalayas, is the fact that Ubisoft is one of my favorite game developers! The prospect feels like a dream come true — most likely because it is! My two greatest passions have somehow found a way to merge into one dream package!
I often feel — as an artist — that I haven't experienced enough to be permitted the right to spill my essence upon digital canvas. It seems very uncanny that I ended my last blog post with the following two lines when very soon afterwards this internship opportunity landed itself in my lap:
It feels as if I have been willing this experience to happen for years. Many people would happily bear testimony to the fact that I have claimed desire to work abroad in Asia for a long time now. Although I am not religious in any sense, it does somewhat feel as if my words are being put to the test. Or to look at it differently, it is almost as if I am calling my own bluff and having to prove to myself that I am not the same disingenuous, insincere prick that I used to be.
Leaving Leicester was the hardest thing I have ever had to do. I have never felt at home and happy to such an extent in all my life, and to sacrifice the people and place I have come to love was the price I ultimately had to pay for my career ambitions to bear fruition.
My last full day at university was among the worst days of my life. As the minutes of the day evaporated into the voids of nonexistence, so too did my perceived involvement on the course begin to dissipate. I had finally met people who I could relate to, and admire, but before I had had time to fully appreciate these two facts, I was walking away into a new life.
I am sure that many people observed the weakening of my character in my last few days of living in Leicester. With emotions of such intensity, it would have been near impossible for me to hide how I was feeling. In fact, on the day that I left, my feelings of nostalgia and longing reached a peak at which it felt as if they might explode out of my chest! For the first time in many, many years, I cried that night.
I am glad that my friends got to witness me at my weakest. Emotional bonds are among the greatest treasures in the human experience and it can be thought of as beautiful that one tiny, little location on this giant planet can evoke such strong feelings in me.
I am now through the worst (leaving Leicester) and have only the best (entering India) ahead of me. As I said, I am not nervous about this challenge. I feel confident and ready to adapt as needed to tackle all the obstacles that are thrown my way! I am ready to begin working as a professional and I am ready to experience an amazing new life in India! I have no reservations; I am doing this because it is what my heart desires!
It is time for me to smash my remaining naivety into little, unobstructive shards on which I can easily tred foot in my journey to develop as a professional, responsible, empathetic adult.
I tribute this blog post to all the wonderful, highly talented people of whom I was lucky enough to cross paths with in Leicester. I could not have possibly wished for more compassionate, artistically invigorating and intellectually nourishing friends as those I had in Leicester. Thank you all so much; I would not be the same man that I am today if not for meeting you.
Thank you.
And finally, a relevant quote:
I am leaving England to work as an intern game artist for Ubisoft Pune, India. This is quite simply the biggest thing to ever happen to me, and it highlights many important changes in who I am. For one thing, I feel confident and prepared for this experience rather than nervous and irresolute — which is a big shift from the person I used to be. I am being thrown into the deep end of a swimming pool with only a slight knowledge of how to swim but I feel that I am now experienced enough to cope outside of my depth and learn to swim while I am drowning.
There are a multitude of reasons as to why I feel this opportunity is ideal for me. Aside from the fact that I absolutely adore everything about Southern Asia and the Himalayas, is the fact that Ubisoft is one of my favorite game developers! The prospect feels like a dream come true — most likely because it is! My two greatest passions have somehow found a way to merge into one dream package!
I often feel — as an artist — that I haven't experienced enough to be permitted the right to spill my essence upon digital canvas. It seems very uncanny that I ended my last blog post with the following two lines when very soon afterwards this internship opportunity landed itself in my lap:
"An artist is not creating art if none of it comes from the heart. I have an empty heart, and it is crying for me to feed it."I want to develop into a better artist and now, finally, I am being given the ideal tools with which to work towards such a goal!
It feels as if I have been willing this experience to happen for years. Many people would happily bear testimony to the fact that I have claimed desire to work abroad in Asia for a long time now. Although I am not religious in any sense, it does somewhat feel as if my words are being put to the test. Or to look at it differently, it is almost as if I am calling my own bluff and having to prove to myself that I am not the same disingenuous, insincere prick that I used to be.
Leaving Leicester was the hardest thing I have ever had to do. I have never felt at home and happy to such an extent in all my life, and to sacrifice the people and place I have come to love was the price I ultimately had to pay for my career ambitions to bear fruition.
My last full day at university was among the worst days of my life. As the minutes of the day evaporated into the voids of nonexistence, so too did my perceived involvement on the course begin to dissipate. I had finally met people who I could relate to, and admire, but before I had had time to fully appreciate these two facts, I was walking away into a new life.
I am sure that many people observed the weakening of my character in my last few days of living in Leicester. With emotions of such intensity, it would have been near impossible for me to hide how I was feeling. In fact, on the day that I left, my feelings of nostalgia and longing reached a peak at which it felt as if they might explode out of my chest! For the first time in many, many years, I cried that night.
I am glad that my friends got to witness me at my weakest. Emotional bonds are among the greatest treasures in the human experience and it can be thought of as beautiful that one tiny, little location on this giant planet can evoke such strong feelings in me.
I am now through the worst (leaving Leicester) and have only the best (entering India) ahead of me. As I said, I am not nervous about this challenge. I feel confident and ready to adapt as needed to tackle all the obstacles that are thrown my way! I am ready to begin working as a professional and I am ready to experience an amazing new life in India! I have no reservations; I am doing this because it is what my heart desires!
It is time for me to smash my remaining naivety into little, unobstructive shards on which I can easily tred foot in my journey to develop as a professional, responsible, empathetic adult.
I tribute this blog post to all the wonderful, highly talented people of whom I was lucky enough to cross paths with in Leicester. I could not have possibly wished for more compassionate, artistically invigorating and intellectually nourishing friends as those I had in Leicester. Thank you all so much; I would not be the same man that I am today if not for meeting you.
Thank you.
And finally, a relevant quote:
"A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty." — Winston Churchill